Q&A: How much should we rely on “skills lists” for our kids?

“I just visited this skills list site that lists what preschool kids should be able to do by certain ages. How much should I rely on ‘skills lists?’ If my child does not meet the ‘norm’ for her age, is she behind? If she exceeds it, is she gifted?”

Answer:
Every child is different, so celebrate their differences and move at a pace that best suits them. Besides . . . Preschool? What could be so important in life that your child needs to know it by the time they’re three? All your child truly needs to know at three is that they’re loved; everything else is just details. Use the freedom that homeschool gives you to teach your children what you feel is important; use these lists as suggestions of what to teach. Public schools have to develop and use "skills lists" because they're teaching to large groups of kids and need to think in terms of averages. However, since you're focusing on your own children, you don’t have to worry about the "slow kid" in the class or how to tailor your teaching to include everyone; you can just concentrate on what your children need now.

That said, we all know that parents will continue to compare their kids to others. Homeschooling parents may feel this pressure more than anyone because it's easy to feel like you're teaching in a vacuum. Establishing a homeschool support group and knowing that you aren’t alone really helps!

Worring about your child’s development is so common that it’s prime time television! A recent Dr. Phil episode focused on this issue with the story of a mom of twin toddler girls. This mother was worried because one of her daughters was developing faster than the other. Dr. Phil's advice was simple: don’t worry and don’t compare kids – even when they're twins! Growth rates (both mentally and physically) differ greatly from individual to individual and, especially when children are young, it's really difficult to say if a child is "gifted" or "delayed" – in the end, most kids will reach a point were they’ll level out along side other children their age.

These skills lists are great guides, and I use them as inspiration for lesson plans, or ideas for things to work on. What to remember at this point is to not worry about where your child falls in among the averages. Who wants an average child anyway? Of course, if you’ve noticed dramatic differences between your child's abilities and the skills lists, you should consult your pediatrician so he or she can help you formulate a plan to overcome this concern and put your fears to rest.

Q&A: What's the best way to teach my kids about the presidential election or politics in general?

“The presidential elections are a great topic to teach this time of year, but how do we approach this important topic without making out kids feel like they need to agree with our own ideals?”

Answer:
There are really two questions here: The first is how to teach kids the basics of civics and our government; the second is about how to teach kids to care about politics and formulate political ideas.

First, here are some web sites where you can find free printable materials to help teach your kids the basics about civics and government:

• Gollopade International is a great site that provides tons of free worksheets and fact sheets that you can print up and use to explain to your kids how elections work, what the constitution is, and other important topics.
• Teach-Nology also has some cool lesson plans for teaching about elections and government.
• PBS has a great list of grade specific lesson plans and activities all based on teaching politics to your child.

As for the second question: How do you teach any child to think for themselves and not be easily persuaded? Parents have been fighting this dilemma for generations! So, in this case, let’s just stick to the political thoughts. You can start by introducing the idea of local politics and getting them involved in their community. Here are some ideas to help you do that: get your family involved in a local charity or highway clean-up campaign; or take your child on a tour of your state's government buildings; and even encourage them to read a newspaper or watch the nightly news. When they can actually see changes taking place and understand that they're involvement really can make a difference then they’ll become more inspired. The idea to remember here is that by just teaching your kids to lead and take responsibility for their environment and community you can help put them on the road to political awareness. It’s hard for anyone to not get passionate about what’s happening in their own backyard or at their favorite park.

     Happy Homeschooling!

     - Amber